You’d be surprised…
Part of my "pause and reflect" theme for the summer. Here's another throwback.
I'm having more and more conversations where the theme seems to be the longing for connection, sprinkled with hesitation. Maybe you can relate? I found this blog from 2018 and thought I'd tweak it and put it out there again for you. The lessons are still pertinent. Enjoy!
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The thing that seems to be coming up again and again? A deep yearning for actual "connection". The kind you get with actual people: friends, partners, colleagues etc. and not the Instagram/Facebook/Zoom kind. I'm talking the real, flesh and blood kind. Face to face. No distractions. So the question is, when was the last time you were "present" for anyone, yourself included? Until you understand that connection and presence starts with you, yourself, and your situation, you're really not equipped to offer it to others. Connection begins with presence. The ability to be with what is.
Here's an actual experience I had in Italy almost four years ago!
I'm on a train, travelling from Sorrento to Napoli. I'm on a train and not the fancy kind. Rather, the kind I was warned about prior to my trip. The kind where I was told to bring wipes and sanitizer for my hands. (Such irony here!). Where the AC is opening the windows, and the “advertising” on the walls is graffiti. That kind of train.
I settle into my seat and start to read a book.
Several stops in, a couple of local musicians get on the train. A saxophonist and an accordion player. They begin to play and I continue with my face in my book. Ironically, a book about being present in the moment...
I notice the irony of the situation and put my book down. I close my eyes and proceed to "experience " the moment. I can hear the music more clearly now. I feel the breeze from the window and I am swaying in my seat as the train speeds along. I become totally immersed in what's going on. And then it happens. I am completely overwhelmed with the absolute beauty of the experience. All my senses are fully engaged in the moment. True presence. It brings me to tears. I let the tears stream down my face and savour that as well.
Then it's over.
Being in the moment. Pure and simple. The power was immense, and now I have a beautiful memory to tap into, to remind me of the gift of presence.
So, how do you bring more presence into your world? Especially when you're in the thick of things.
Being conscious about doing it first of all.
For me, it's remembering that the whole experience was maybe 3 to 5 minutes tops, and how often do I find myself with a couple of minutes in my day?
How many of you have 3 to 5 minutes between a meeting, or a phone call where you could sit and just “be”. Wherever that may be?
Maybe you can go back to visit an experience that brought you a gift that you could use in that moment.
That gift might be: patience, clarity, calm, or a little escape to a trip you once took. Try it next time you have a few minutes and see what opens up for you.
Then, maybe, start extending that same "gift" of presence to those around you - just a couple of minutes, with your eyes away from your phone/computer/TV or whatever distraction is in front of you. Give your full, undivided attention. Notice what changes in you, and the other person when you do this. You may be pleasantly surprised.
Grazie Italia.
Are you willing to give it a try?
Let's get to it...
Your challenge for the next week...
The slower, lazy days of summer are the perfect time for reflection.
The next time you find yourself with a couple of minutes, turn inwards and take a few deep breaths. Notice any sensations you may be feeling in your body; listen to any sounds that may be going on around you, near or far; if you have your eyes open, take in all of the scenery around you (even if you're in your home office). Really make the experience vivid. So vivid that you could call it back another time to enjoy. Then, slowly, gently, ease yourself back into your day.
Are you ready to take a time-out to assess where you're at? Contact me and we'll get you clear...
Stay safe and well.
Cheers,
Ann
What can you learn on a “seedy” train ride?