Happy End of January! It's been a long one.
Did you know that by the 32nd day of the year, ~80% of people who make "New Year's resolutions" have given up on them?
Maybe you're one of them?
If so, don't be so hard on yourself, you're clearly not alone
Why do so many people give up on their resolutions? There are probably a multitude of reasons and what may be the most powerful is, your current habits.
The things you do on autopilot without giving them a thought. Those things. All habits or behaviours serve a purpose for you which is why it can be so difficult to make a change.
Your brain in particular is a fan of habits. While you do things automatically, it's quite happy to go along and do it's job of keeping you alive. It's not interested in the least in you making any changes. Hence...the difficulties you can face when you want to make changes...even if they're for very good reasons. Your brain is going to make it difficult for you.
Difficult? Yes. Impossible? No.
Have you already given up on your "resolution"? Or, maybe you don't make resolutions, but you've had a time in the past where you've stopped pursuing something because it felt like an uphill battle? There's hope for you.
Let's get to it...
Your challenge...
Habits are strong. You have to find the benefit of doing what you're currently doing, or not doing (that you say you want to do). There's always a benefit. Humans don't do something repeatedly without a benefit.
Let's say that the habit that's getting in the way of doing what you say you want to do is procrastination.
Ask yourself:
What are the benefits of procrastination? Yes...there are benefits. Maybe you get a break, or you can avoid doing something. Or, you get time to think. There's something there for sure.
Now ask yourself:
How else could I get these benefits?
See what comes up for you. Maybe it's about scheduling in regular breaks in your day.
Take an example of your own and do the exercise above.
Once you are able to identify the benefit of the habit or behaviour that's getting in your way, you can begin to think about what else you could do that would be a more useful way for you to get the same benefit. This, in and of itself, will make your pursuit of that change you want to make so much easier.
What else may be getting in your way?
What's your "why" for this resolution or goal?
Make sure it's yours. Not something someone else thinks you should want. Your "why" is what will pull you forward. You need to remember why you wanted to make that change in the first place.
How are you framing it? It matters. For example:
Instead of saying you want less stress, ask yourself: What do I want more of? What do I want instead?
You don't have a strategy in place for when things get difficult:
It could be as simple as saying: If xxx happens, then I will do yyy - and practicing it so you're ready when the time comes.
Be consistent. Be persistent. The key to success is in taking small steps daily.
If you're ready to give it another shot Contact me You have all of the skills, strengths and capabilities you need. Let’s work together and reconnect you with them!
Warmly,
Ann
It’s not you…it’s your habits