I'm 100%, in full agreement of saying no so you leave space for the things that you want and that really matter and...
...this blog focuses on when saying yes is useful and saying no is not in your best interest...where saying no is avoidance
In my case...pretty much always due to fear.
About a year ago I had a voicemail on my phone asking me if I would consider presenting at a business event…one that probably would’ve put me in front of a roomful of my ideal clients by the way. As I listened to the voicemail, the commentary in my head started and it went something like this:
You don't know enough.
It's not the right time.
What if your technology fails?
They've made a mistake...
The commentary was so loud and convincing that by the time I was on the phone speaking to the organizer of the event, I’d already rejected the opportunity and had someone to refer them to as well. They spent the entire call trying to convince me why I was the right person and I spent the call convincing them otherwise.
As soon as I got in my car to head out to an appointment and the amygdala/hippocampus discussion going on in my head had settled down, I realized holy s*** of course I can do this! Of course, I can! I promptly called the event organizer letting them know that I could totally do it. By the time I arrived at my appointment and sat to wait I put together a draft for the whole event and I did it within 5 minutes so clearly...I could do it!
Then I get the message back...time was of the essence for them... I had given them a great referral and they hired them. Ouch.
I shake my head now when I think about this… our biggest lessons are sometimes painful, and that was a lesson for sure.
Can you relate? Maybe you have a similar story to tell?
Here's what I walked away with:
Before you (as in ME!) say no, take a breath and consider the following:
You're never going to feel 100% ready.
What does this person see in you that you may be blind to?
You're not gonna get any better at what you're doing until you say yes to these opportunities.
Trust that you know way more than you think you do.
Are you ready?
Let’s get to it…
Your challenge…
What have you been avoiding because you're afraid or feel unprepared, not experienced enough, or whatever is stopping you and compelling you to say no?
Here's what's been helpful for me and I hope will also be helpful to you too. Reflect on this:
What if you do know enough?
You're never going to feel a hundred percent ready.
You're not gonna get any better at what you're doing until you say yes to these opportunities.
Often you're the last one to recognize your own competence.
Stop arguing against yourself, for your limitations.
When someone sees something in you that they think would be useful obviously there's a reason.
Say yes!!
I'm happy to report that since this "incident," I've returned to my "say yes and figure it out" motto.
So how about it? What if you say yes? What could be possible for you?
I'm a few steps ahead of you, shining some light on the breadcrumb trail for you... Contact me Let's play a bit in the muck!
Warmly,
Ann
Why work with me? If you're looking at growing your confidence (or any other skill)... and you want to work with somebody who gets it, who's still on the path...I'm your person! Contact me Plus we'll have a lot of fun too!
Say yes! Before you overthink it…